Many of us are so busy in our day to day lives, that we don’t take the time to realize how something so small can mean so much to someone. We tend to look at things from our own individual perspectives, and value certain actions or objects based on what they mean to us. There’s the saying that one person’s trash is another person’s treasure. Not the perfect analogy here, but an action that’s no big deal to one person may be special to another.
I had one of those experiences the other day. I ran into a elderly gentleman who was in a motorized wheelchair. He didn’t look healthy, and seemed to have a sad face. He was asking people, while in a public walkway, if they could help him. Most kept walking by.
As I walked by him, slowing to get a better sense of what he was about, he looked at me and said, in a raspy voice, “excuse me, would you be willing to help me?”
Now, living in a large metropolitan area, I have seen all kinds of scams. Plus, you never know when a seemingly innocuous situation could be a setup.
That said, I still stopped and asked him, “What do you need?”
He looked at me, seemingly with relief and appreciation, and said – with difficulty – “Can you please pick up that book for me?”
Next to his motorized wheelchair was a book, almost like a diary of some kind. I looked around, making sure this was legit (you never know, I thought), and grabbed this book for him. Then I handed it to him. He took the book gently from me, hands shaking, and said “Thank You”.
He then proceeded to tell me it’s a book that’s important to him, and unfortunately he just couldn’t pick it up when it was on the ground. He had real trouble getting in and out of the motorized wheelchair. The part that hit me, though, is that he said “I really appreciate that you did this for me. Nobody else would stop and help me. They all walked by me without answering or just said no.”
It made my stomach turn when I heard that.
Then, I asked him if he needed any other help. He said “No, thank you. I just really appreciate you doing that for me. Thank you very much, it was really helpful to me.”
I followed by asking “Do you have anyone nearby to help you?”
He said “No, I live alone. It’s not easy but I have my phone with me if anything really bad happens to me. I had internal bleeding last year and a heart attack, but the ambulance got there just in time.”
I asked again if he was sure about not needing anything, and he said he was sure, and he thanked me again. Then he slowly motored onward, as I watched him move on. After a few seconds, I moved on too.
As I reflect on that situation, I think of that old man – so frail, with so little energy, and little mobility. And nobody living with him. He had a very tough existence. Yet he carried on, and showed me appreciation for helping him. I just did the right thing, nothing more.
The people that walked right by him missed out on a great opportunity for a chance encounter that could have enriched them immensely. How can we be so callous to let this be the exception, rather than the norm, when it comes to helping someone? I felt bad for being leery at first; I could have walked by him too.
I have to say, whatever small amount of help I gave him, he gave me much more back in terms of happiness for being able to truly help someone who needed it. More than that, he taught me how someone in a tough situation can still be nice to others and appreciate what they have. It was actually a moving experience.
What a great investment of my time. It paid off tremendously.
Wherever you are, sir, I hope you’re well. It was great to meet you. And by the way – thank you.
What a wonderful and touching story. I wish I had come across that gentleman. Poor guy just needed his book, and people are so jaded they couldn’t even stop to hear what he needed. Thank goodness you came across him.
I was in a grocery store a few months ago and an elderly man had all his items bagged, and he couldn’t find his wallet anyway. He was going to have to leave and get his wallet and come back, which would have taken forever as he moved so slow. I paid his bill, it was only 21 dollars and you would think I bought him a new car, he was so grateful. As you said, doing that small deed for him was way more beneficial to me than to him. He even said ‘my wife will never believe that someone was nice enough to do this for me’. It made my week.
Thanks for sharing this great story.
Good for you! That ‘s refreshing to read, just brought a smile to my face.
When I see elderly people that are down on their luck, I just think it’s automatically an unfortunate situation. Probably idealistic, I know.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Your story brought tears to my eyes. I hope I would have been as compassionate and helpful as you if in the same situation.
Bucksome – as a grown man, I have to admit that I was quite moved to see someone like him struggling so much yet behaving with such dignity. I really don’t like to anyone suffer, and someone that old by themselves – it doesn’t seem fair in any way. I truly respect that gentleman.
As Bucksome and EveryDay Tips said this was incredibly touching. It’s so easy for us to walk by and assume that someone else will do something, or that it’s probably a scam. I think you should be proud that you were able to see past all that, and just saw a frail old man that needed some help.
I hope that I find a way to perform a random act of kindness just as you did. Thanks for sharing this!
It’s so easy for us (especially city dwellers) to become callous. Thank you for not being that kind of person, and for being that kind to a person.
A while back I gave a dollar to an older man holding a cardboard sign asking for help. As I did this, a guy drove by and yelled “Sucker!”
Nice.
I wrote about it for MSN Money’s Smart Spending blog. If it’s OK to post links, here goes:
http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/SmartSpending/blog/page.aspx?post=1297735
Donna – I’m glad you helped that guy. Better to err on the side of kindness. Not always easy to follow this, but a good rule of thumb. How would we want to be treated if in the same situation? Thanks for sharing.
Your story is a thrilling one.Am really moved
I sure do love spending a little bit of time reading this site. For lack of a better way to put it – it “reminds me” of what I think we should all be like .
This year I “volunteered” to help teach 7th & 8th Grade Sunday School. That was a huge random act of kindness right there 🙂 We start off each Sunday with the same topic. I ask, “What opportunities did God place in front of you this week to be able to do a random act of kindness?” Yes, truly which is why when I saw this topic I had to check it out! The kids are for the most part unsure, and they stumble to find something. But each week, since we are repeating it we receive a few more real life scenarios from the kids which is neat.
Some memories: My wife & I are 3 months married, 22 yrs old and on our way back home at 1:00am, an hour drive. The old car has a water leak, 3 times I pull over to let the temp cool down. All 3 times someone pulls over to help us as they have a gallon of water for just such a situation. Three times within 1 hour at 1 o’clock in the morning??? Scary when someone does pull over to “help” you, grateful when they do. I carry 2 Prestone anti-freeze jugs in my trunk to this day.
In Japan on business. We are hurrying through the train stations. I am perspiring like crazy. My guide sees an elderly confused woman. We walk her to her platform, painfully slow. Then Shono-san turns to me and says “So good, now we must REALLY run!”. (good weight loss program)
$20 bill to a homeless man. He catches up with me, “Sir, you gave me a $20, did you mean less?” “What will you do with the $20?” “Eat a real good meal.” “Is it enough?” “Oh yes Sir, you have given me more than enough, my friend will help me enjoy it.”
Who is helping who?
What a heartbreaking story. It makes me want to do something to help the elderly and/or the disabled. I value independence above almost all else, and I can’t imagine losing my physical independence … not being able to pick up a book from the ground. People who maintain good spirits despite physical hardships are really inspiring.
Thanks 4 helping him and others